When this whole diagnosis happened over a year ago, I was hopeful and was doing okay but in all likelihood the cancer would catch up with me and tackle me at some point. So, I lived the mantra that I have always kept to live life to the fullest, to live every day like it was my last. The days still passed and my watch hands still go round and round, but now every day is so much sweeter.* Every thing I do holds that much more relevance in my life.
What I didn't expect was that the change in seasons would have such a profound emotional impact. The fact that it's warmer now is absolutely amazing to me. I go out to bask in the sun every chance I get. I run occasionally now. (Don't get too excited I'm not running a marathon like Katie is here.) The motion of the earth around the sun is so phenomenal and I can picture the sun's rays hitting us more directly now. I don't know... I don't know how to explain it. Every flower is so remarkable and every breeze that blows fills my nares with olfactory wonders. Both on the large scale and the small scale, life is so much more impactful to me. I do what I do and the seasons change around me. For some reason, that always comes as a surprise nowadays.
hmmm...
mike
*Cept for a period of time in there when I was taking psychiatric drugs. For me, that was an awful move. While they worked in stopping some of the depression and anxiety I was experiencing they took the spice out of life. Don't quit your psychiatric meds based on my account, but anecdotally, I feel a thousand times better since having had quit them.
